/thoughts

I really have no idea what is happening right now. You're always sad... you're always pissed or angry... You always wake up in the middle of the night because of nightmares... You're always so scared... what else can I do? I try to help but I'm running out of ways to help you and make you happy. You're happy with me sometimes but most of the time... you're sad. What can I do? I'm really trying my best here... but you always allow your negative thoughts to take over. You think I don't notice but I know sometimes you just pretend you're not sad or angry (just to make me happy). I don't want that. Now you're telling me that it seems like it's easy for me to go through a day without talking to you. How did that enter your mind?! I talk to you everyday! All the time! When we're not talking, we're both sleeping. Yeah, we fall asleep on each other but that doesn't mean shit. I don't understand this.

Ugh.