This letter, i wrote, for my 3 best friends, last year, before my accident. but i never gave it to them because i left it in my drawer. things happened to fast that day that i forgot to give it. i found it today, inserted in my notebook.
dear tom, luc, nick,
yo guys. (nice way of starting this letter eh). you guys are my only most cherished friends. you guys are my fucking brothers and i’m sorry i had to do this to you. i don’t know what else to do and you guys know the whole fucking story. this consumes my brain most of the time and i tell you guys that ALL THE FUCKING TIME. but that’s not what im gonna write here cos you know all that crap already. i guess there’s really just ONE main thing that i wanna tell you boys and that’s “thank you.” it’s harder to leave you guys because who fucking saved me when my parents hit me? you guys. who fucking stopped me from getting into fist fights? you guys. who fucking visited me when i was confined in the hospital? you guys. who helped me in school when i was about to flunk my subjs? you guys. the list could go on and on and on and on and i just want to say thank you for doing your best with me. i failed you guys too but heck, this sucks. this fucking sucks. i feel like kurt cobain right now. (that’s actually funny right?)
you guys mean the world to me and yes, right now i’m reminiscing about everything we did and went through in a span of 4 years. the hang outs, spontaneous drunk and sleepover nights, listening to music in parking lots, skate days, snowboarding days, parties, fights, girls, playstation/xbox/wii nights, STAR WARS REENACTMENTS in each others houses, tom’s cancer, that night we blew up that tv we found in the trash, those days when we would take the train to london at 12 midnight to just party and head back before our parents looked for us, that night when we bought a bunch of fireworks and just lit it up for fun, that night we decided to act like tourists and went to the eiffel tower and but on some fake asian accent, just all the stupid random things we did. i’m thinking about all that and those were the best times in my life.
you guys gave me so much hope but now it’s just not enough. i’m sorry for doing this to you because it’s really not fair to you guys but remember what we say? “THIS JUST SUCKS!” i love you guys and keep taking care of each other because we’re lucky to have found each other. not everyone finds a good set of friends who are smart enough, fun enough, and compassionate enough.
thanks guys.
-R.
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